Carleen and Mike

We’ve lost Turbo again. Sometime last night while Mike was trying to get Liam asleep and I was still at work, he walked through our partially opened gate. Mike believes the meter man forgot to close it properly. That’s a possibility, however, I’m also inclined to believe, given the wind yesterday that the gate blew itself open. Mike and I had an argument over this last night which resulted in me voluntarily opting to sleep on the couch for the night. I’ve always believed that the fence/gate was insecure but because Mike is no fence expert and because our yard is a little awkward in shape, I never wanted to say straight out, Mike it’s a shitty fence can we please get something else a little stronger that doesn’t involve chicken wire. Half our yard is made out of chicken wire. As you can see, I’m still a little mad at my husband, despite the fact that I know I’m probably being way to hard on him.

So, my parents came over yesterday to help us look for Turbo but it was far to dark and given his past escapes it was almost certain that he could be half way cross town at that point.

For those of you who don’t know already, I was recently diagnosed with panic disorder (it isn’t extreme, thankfully I can still leave the house and go to work). My Thanksgiving week was not really a great Thanksgiving week. While everyone else was thanking their turkey and their family, I was simply thankful for the few pieces of sanity I had left in my head. I was dizzy, dazed and under the irrational impression that I was going to die of some horrible disease. I can’t even begin to explain how frightening, how real, and how paralyzing these feelings were. Mike and my parents got me through that weekend until I managed to see my most awesome doctor the following Monday. I’ve since seen a therapist who has set me to work on some exercises from a book which she refers to as the “bible” when it comes to treating panic disorders. Anyway, what I mean to say is, I really did not need to be dealing with a lost dog right now. It’s below freezing outside, I can only imagine how cold and alone he must feel. He has tags and the last time he got out someone found him and called us. I can only hope that a kind soul will find him again and we’ll get him back soon, but for some reason I’m hesitant to assume that we will be that lucky.

I’m angry, sad and confused. If you see me around today, please don’t attempt to cheer me up because I will probably only scowl at you. At this point, I don’t even think John Cleese could crack a smile out of me.

Turbo, if you’re out there please use that damn scent dog nose and find your way home.

UPDATE: Turbo was found last night around midnight, a few blocks away from our house. They found our number via our vet this morning and we picked him up - he’s nice and safe and sound now.

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